To read part eight of day ten, click here.

I started gathering a pile of things I could use. It was a pitiful pile – all I could find was sticks, rocks, and rhododendron leaves. But it was all I could find, so it was what I had to work with.

I groaned and got to work. After trying a couple of designs, I just made a box. I outlined a square with sticks, and filled the bottom with rhododendron leaves.

Katie had said that it didn’t need to be fancy, and I wasn’t going to waste time on something I wasn’t going to really use. I scattered the rest of my pile of materials before sitting back down on my mat.

I sat with my journal for a few more minutes, coming up with three more things for our “give and take”. At that point I got up and went to my backpack. I started pulling things out, trying to get to the things that I knew were down in the very bottom.

Wow… I’d forgotten there were so many. I started muttering to myself as I looked through the stack of letters I was pulling out of the stack. There were a ton! I had letters from all of my grandparents, letters from four of my Aunts, letters from six of my cousins (all under the age of ten), and the letters that I had already opened from my family.

I picked up the first letter from the stack and opened it, wishing I had my pocketknife with me. It would have made it so much easier!

The letter was from my Grammy. As I read it I remember feeling so grateful for my family. All of my extended family means so much to me. There is something that’s almost magical when we all get together. We may not get along all of the time, but we’re family. And because we’re a family, we’re stuck with each other.

Maybe someday I will have that kind of relationship with my siblings. Because right now, we act like normal siblings. We fight, and we don’t like each other all the time. There have been people who say “we act perfectly all the time” and I just laugh inside, because we don’t. We’re normal people with normal qualities.

I just pray that someday I’ll have a better relationship with my siblings. I already have a good one with them. But right now, there are definitely some things we can work on in our relationship. 🙂

I put down the letter from Grammy and picked up the next one on the stack. It was also from Grammy! I opened it up and pulled out the letter to open it. As I was pulling the letter out, another slip of paper fell to the ground.

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part seven of day ten, click here.

I sat there, with absolutely no idea of what to write. What was I supposed to write? I flipped through my journal and read my assignments again.

“Solo assignments:”

1 – journal about the image of myself I have given to the crew

2 – write myself a letter to be torn out and sent to me in six months
   a – include a bucket list with at least eight things on it

3 – give and take
   a – write everyone’s name down
   b – think about them
   c – “give” something to each of them
   d – “take” something from each of them that I want

I decided to make this simple. I started with number one. I couldn’t decide what they meant by journal – in the end I just did bullet points.

“My Image From The Crews POV:”

• helps where she can
• can’t carry much weight
• complains when she is hiking
• always asking people if they are ok
• does not like swearing and “war stories”
• is scared of running water
• has a crazy family

Those were some of the things that I felt had defined my relationship with my crew. I knew there were more. There were a lot more. But that was all I could think of at the moment.

When I was done listing everything I could think of, I wrote my letter to myself. I didn’t make a second copy – I won’t know what it says until I receive the letter in a couple of weeks.

I started working on my “Give and Take” list. I didn’t get very far! I managed to write down a total of three things about three separate people before I couldn’t think of any more.

Since I couldn’t think of anything else to write for the give and take, I decided to work on my mailbox.

*Everything in italics is copied directly from my journal*

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part six of day ten, click here.

I reached the water and stepped onto a rock in the middle of the shallows. I wasn’t allowed to take my boots off, and I didn’t want to get them wet. Unfortunately, I was going to get the soaked the next day. But I didn’t know that, and I didn’t want to get them wet in the river.

There was a deep hole a couple of feet away from me. It looked like it would be the perfect place to wash my hair. There were shallows all around it, so I could stand without getting the inside of my boots wet. But it was deep enough for me to get all of my hair in it.

I started walking through the river to get over to the hole, and almost slipped and landed face first in the water. I could feel my foot slipping out from under me, and I knew it was coming. But my knee hit the bottom first and I was able to do a weird pushup and keep the rest of my body out of the water.

“Thanks, Lord!”

When I slipped, I had slipped right next to the hole. I figured I might as well stay where I was – I did a plank and from there lowered my head into the water. The water was freezing, but it felt really good on my scalp. I realized that I wasn’t going to be able to do a one handed plank and stood up, hanging my head so I didn’t drip water all over myself.

I wrung out my hair and put it up in a rough bun, trying to ignore the freezing cold water that dripped down my neck. I shivered as I scooped up a handful of water and rubbed it down my leg. Once I had rinsed off all of my limbs, I turned around to find a spot to sit. I wanted to just sit by the river for a moment.

There was a nice sized rock right next to the river, so I sat down. I got right back up when three large crayfish came out from a couple of rocks in the area, and started coming right at me. I wasn’t going to stay around and fight a bunch of crayfish! Those things are nasty, and it hurts when they pinch you.

I headed back up the hill to my campsite and went straight to my backpack to get my long sleeved shirt. I sat down on my mat and opened my journal. It was time to knock out those assignments!

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part five of day ten, click here.

After searching for over fifteen minutes, I found two sticks that I thought would work. They were slightly curved, which would actually work better than a straight one. The only problem was, how was I going to get it down into the ground? I also needed stakes for the other corners, (to tie the cord to) and I needed to find something to pound my stakes.

I thought about it for a couple of minutes while I started tying the para-cord to the loops. I tied the top two cords to the trees, then found some more sticks for stakes.

When I had found the sticks that I thought would work, I went down by the river. I resisted the temptation to jump into the water and kept looking for what I needed – a rock. It had to be a big rock, heavy enough to pound the stakes in.

But it also had to be small enough that I could carry it back up the steep trail that led to my tarp. I finally found one that wasn’t too heavy and started up the hill. It took me a couple of minutes, but I managed to get up there in one piece, with my rock.

I pounded my stakes in and tied the cord to them, adjusting the ones on the top when I needed to. I was in the process of pounding the extra stakes through the loops I didn’t have strings for when I heard something coming down the trail.

It was Katie, loaded with all of the group gear we had left behind. She smiled at me as she walked past and I grinned back. Just seeing someone made me feel better – I wasn’t entirely alone.

When I was done pounding stakes, I shoved my backpack under my tarp. I pulled out my black mat and brought it over to my sitting area, along with my journal and a pen.

As I was sitting down, I remembered. I had promised myself that I would go in the water when I was done with my tarp! I got up and started sliding down the hill to the river, and then I remembered that I still had to build a mailbox.

Since I was already half way down to the river, I decided I would build my mailbox when I got back. It probably wasn’t even noon yet – we had given up our watches at 9. I didn’t think it had been three hours.

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part four of day ten, click here.

We had to go back the way we had just come? Now that wasn’t fair. I before turning and moving to the side, letting Katie pass me. I looked behind me before walking off, waving to Rebecca, knowing that it wouldn’t be long before I was the one being left alone.

A couple of minutes later, Katie stopped walking.

“Brett, this is your campsite. Good luck!”

Luke waved at me as he and Katie walked off, leaving me alone. As soon as they were out of sight I sat down in the small clearing they had left me in, determined not to cry, but already missing the constant companionship.

I decided that I was going to get to work on my tarp first, so if it decided to rain I would be ready. I couldn’t really see the sky from where I was, and I didn’t want to be caught by surprise. The clouds had been starting to turn grey, so I knew it was going to happen eventually.

Looking around the small clearing to try and find a good spot for my tarp was difficult. It was a small clearing, just big enough for my tarp on one side, and a small area for me to sit on the other. It was surrounded by rhododendron trees, the trail on one side, and the river on the other side.

Katie had said that I was allowed to go down to the river, as long as I stayed right next to my campsite. I decided that I would go down and wash myself off, as soon as I was done with my tarp and my mailbox. I couldn’t wait to spend a lot of time in the water!

I pulled the tarp and para-cord from my backpack. I untangled the cords, wondering how many I had. There were four. I grimaced as I realized that it wasn’t going to be enough for the corners and the top. I thought about it for a minute before I started searching for some straight sticks. If I could find a couple of sturdy ones, I could drive them through the loops to hold my tarp down.

The only problem was, I couldn’t find any suitable sticks.

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part three of day ten, click here.

“Um, I don’t know. My back is really, really bothering me. Maybe I sprained something? It’s hurt me before, but never this badly.” He winced again as he stood up.

“Let me know if there is anything I can do. Ok? I really hate seeing people hurting.”

“I will. Thanks.”

He bent over again and started picking strips of bark off the ground. Rebecca and I were just sitting there watching him, until Rebecca spoke up.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m picking up bark that I can use for my mailbox.”

“That’s not a bad idea. I think I’m going to do that too…”

I sat there and watched them run around picking up bark. Luke kept wincing as he moved around and I prayed that his back wouldn’t hurt anymore.

“Do you girls know where Princess is? I think I might go on a date with her before Jen or Katie gets back.”

Rebecca told him that he should check the shared gear pile, and he turned to walk away. As he started walking away, Katie came back.

He sighed and came back to pick up his pack. We marched off in silence, no sounds except the noise of our feet crushing the dead leaves on the trail.

We walked for what seemed like a half an hour, but was probably a lot less. I wished I had my watch so that I could tell what time it was – I kept looking at my wrist, but my watch wasn’t there. I wondered if Bruce and Tullia were doing the same thing.

Katie stopped walking and I almost ran into her – I had been busy thinking about what I would do first when I go to my campsite.

“Rebecca, this is your campsite. Luke and Brett, we are going back the way we came.”

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part two of day ten, click here.

I put all of the stuff I had grabbed into my pack, and checked it for anything that wasn’t mine. I closed my pack up, putting my journal away too.

When everyone had grabbed all of their things, we all sat back down to receive further instructions.

“When you are dropped off at your campsite, you won’t have much to do. You can do this whenever you like, but you have to do it sooner or later. You have to get your tarp up, unless you want to sleep without it. You have to do your assignments. And you have to build your mailbox. “

“Your mailbox is something you will build to hold anything you need to give us. If you need more water, put your water bottle in your mailbox. When you are done with your food, put it in your mailbox. If you need something, leave us a note. Got it?”

We all nodded our heads. That was new – I didn’t know that we were going to have to build something! I hoped that my campsite would have things that I could build with. Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything I could think of.

“Kayce, Bruce and Bobby, you guys are coming with me. Sarah Margaret, Maggie, Tullia and Ben, you go with Jen. The rest of you, stay here until one of us comes back to get you. From this moment on, we will all be silent. There will be no talking until we see each other tomorrow. Understand?”

We nodded again, and I almost laughed at the looks of panic on my crewmates faces. They couldn’t believe that we weren’t even allowed to say goodbye.

Jen and Katie walked off, with most of my crewmates following them. Luke, Rebecca and I waved at them as they left, and I tried to push down the panic I felt as they walked away.

Luke stood up and bent down to pick something up, and as he did that a look of pain covered his face. I forgot what Katie had just said, because I was worried about him.

“Luke, are you ok?”

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part one of day ten, click here.

“Did everyone get all of that written down?” Jen laughed as half of my crew looked up at her in confusion before looking back down at their journals. I had been able to keep pace with her, writing things down almost as soon as she said it. So I was done, and was able to look around at my crewmates.

I knew that I was going to miss everyone during the next day. I didn’t realize how much I was going to miss them though.

A couple of minutes later, Jen started talking again. “Now that everyone is done, those of you who have watches please hand them to me.”

I was going to have to give her my watch? I couldn’t even have that? What was the world coming to? I took off my watch with a sigh, bringing it over to Jen.

Bruce and Tullia came over with their watches, and I’m sure the look on my face matched the looks on them. We all looked like we were mourning, already missing the familiar weight around our wrists.

Just kidding. It didn’t feel right though, not having a watch.

“Thank you. Now, this is what’s going to happen. Katie and I will drop you guys off, each of you in your own campsite. You each need a tarp, a pile of para-cord, and a WAG-Bag. Get your solo food out of your food sack. Take all of your crew gear out of your backpack, and put it in that pile over there. When you are done with that, come sit down again.”

We all hurried to do what we had been told to do. I grabbed a personal tarp, and a pile of strings. I picked up a WAG-Bag, wondering what it was.

Oh. That’s what it was. That was disgusting. We needed to have special bags to poop in?

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part fifteen of day nine, click here.

Bruce was shaking my shoulder, trying to get me to wake up.

“Brett, you’ve got to get up. C’mon – I’ve got to go wake up the other guys. Brett? Brett!”

My voice sounded strange, almost fuzzy. It was weird. “I’m awake. What time is it?”

“It’s six. Remember, that’s what time we were supposed to get up? You’ve got to wake up the other girls so we can get ready.”

I had only gotten three hours of sleep. I couldn’t believe it. I shook my head quickly to wake up and thanked him. He walked back to his tarp and woke up the guys while I woke up the girls.

We all packed up our gear and went to find Katie and Jen. Katie was stirring up a big pot of oatmeal. That made me really happy – it was good oatmeal. It was best with brown sugar…

“Hey Katie? Do we have any brown sugar to go with the oatmeal?”

“Yep, we’ve got more than we had last time.”

Everyone who heard her grinned in anticipation. We all searched for our food bags in the pile – we wanted to get our bowls and spoons so we could eat!

When we were done eating, we put our bowls and spoons into a pile near the food bags. Everyone sat back down in a circle so we could talk about solo.

Someone started whispering. “I’m really nervous about this. A whole day alone? I’m going to sneak over to Maggie’s place and we’ll hang out.”

“We’ll get in trouble, but I don’t care. It’s going to be freaky.”

The whispering stopped when Jen came back from wherever she had gone.

“Ok, I need everyone’s attention. These are the things you need to do while you are on solo.”

Katie handed her a notebook.

“Everyone, pull out your journal. These are your solo assignments. You will want to write them down.

The first one – journal about the image of yourself that you think you given the crew. How do you think they see you?

The second one – write yourself a letter to be torn out and sent to you in six months, and include a bucket list with at least eight things on it.

The third (and last) one is an exercise we like to call give and take. Write everyone’s name down in your journal, and think about that person. Then you need to give each person a quality that you think would benefit them. And once you have done that, take a quality from them that you would like for yourself.”

Click here to read the next part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part fourteen of day nine, click here.

I couldn’t believe that it was 2:30 in the morning, and I was having to set up the bear hang.

While Maggie was finding the bear hang ropes, I sat down on a log. Tullia came over to get the tarp from my pack, looking at me in concern.

“Are you ok? You look like you’re about to fall asleep sitting there.”

“Oh, I’ve already done that at least ten times tonight. Why am I this tired? I’ve never been this tired before. None of you are falling asleep walking down the trail like I am…”

“Have you ever pulled an all nighter?”

My blank look must have answered her.

“That’s why. The rest of us are used to this. Well, we’re not used to hiking through the woods at two in the morning. But we are used to being up this late, if not later than this.”

She grinned at me and walked away, calling over her shoulder “You’ll be fine.”

Maggie yelled across the camp “Brett, we need you!”

I stumbled to my feet and walked over to her and Jen.

“We have to find a good tree. Start looking.”

The three of us wandered around, staring up at the sky. I kept looking down quickly and closing my eyes – in the soaproom, looking up with your eyes open is just asking for soap in your eyes. I was so tired that things like that just happened instinctively.

“I think I found a tree, Jen. Will that one work?” Maggie pointed up at the sky. I couldn’t tell which tree she was pointing at – there were around 50 that she could have been looking at.

I sat down on a log while they were talking about potential trees. The next thing I knew, Maggie was taking the bear hang things out of my hands.

“Just go to bed, Brett. Jen and I can do this.”

I didn’t argue. I shook my head, told them good night, and wandered around until I found our tarp. I spread my stuff out and then walked over to the guy’s tarp.

“Hey, Bruce?”

Bruce stuck his head out from under the tarp. “Yeah?”

“Will your watch wake you up in the morning? Because we’re supposed to wake up at six, and that’s in three hours. I’m not going to hear my watch at all.”

“I’ll come wake you up. Don’t worry about it.”

I thanked him, heading for my sleeping bag. I almost got into it with my hiking boots on, but stopped myself just in time. I didn’t even have time to do my evaluation of the day before I fell asleep, knowing that I was going to have to wake up in less than three hours. Even my cold, wet clothes didn’t stop me. I was going to get as much sleep as possible!

Click here to read the first part of Day Ten.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part thirteen of day nine, click here.

“I think so. I’m terrified, but I’m not physically hurt. Actually, I’m going to be really sore tomorrow. My knees and my butt hit the rock pretty hard multiple times. But I’ll be ok.”

Sarah Margaret came over, a look of relief on her face.

“I thought you were going to fall into the river! Are you ok??”

“I’m pretty sure I am. I’ll be really sore tomorrow, but I’m ok.”

I stood up and started inching my way towards the crossing. It wasn’t far – even at the slow speed I was going at, I managed to make it in two or three minutes.

Standing at the crossing the fear came back. It was dark, so I couldn’t see the river very well. What I could see was that it was pretty wide, and it was coming almost to my crewmates’ waists. Which meant it would be well over my waist.

“It’s your turn, Brett. Unfasten your hip strap and chest strap, please.”

As I started unclipping things, Jen gave me a smile and put a hand on my shoulder.

“You are ok, right? That slip looked nasty.”

“I’m ok. I’ll be better once this river is behind us.”

“Everyone will be better when this river is behind us. Camp is right on the other side – it won’t be long until we can fall asleep. All right, off you go.”

I was back to being terrified. But I knew that the sooner I got onto the other side, the better.

The crossing wasn’t that bad. I think I slipped once or twice, but didn’t get too wet. Well, I still got wet over my waist. But that’s just because the water was that high.

When everyone was on the other side of the river, we got into a circle.

“Ok, everyone, get your tarps up and get to bed! Maggie and Brett, you need to go with Jen and get the bear hang set up. Everyone else, make sure all of your food items are in your food sacks and they are brought to Jen, Maggie and Brett.”

I groaned under my breath. I had completely forgotten that I was on Bear Hang. That meant I wouldn’t get to bed for another half hour, at least.

Click here to read the next part of Day Nine.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part twelve of day nine, click here.

I was sliding down the rock, my body plunging down towards the river. I opened my mouth to scream, but no sound came out. My hands were trying to find something to grab onto so I wouldn’t fall into the water, but there was nothing.

I’m going to die. I’m going to fall into this water and hit my head on a rock and die. I have to get my pack off. I’ve got to get it off.

I could hear Sarah Margaret yelling my name, looking at me in horror as I slid down the rock. I looked up at where I had been standing not even ten seconds before.

The bush! That rhododendron bush was right there. I reached as far as I could, trying to grab the bush that could save me from falling into the river.

I couldn’t reach it from where I was. I dug my fingers into the rock, trying to slow myself down and boost myself up to where I could grab the bush. My fingers found a little dip in the rock and I used that to boost myself up a bit, just enough so I could reach the bush.

All I could reach was the tip of one branch, and it was about as thick as a baby’s finger. I panicked as the hand that was keeping me from the river lost its grip. I knew that the branch wasn’t going to be enough to hold me.

I was still sliding, but it wasn’t as quickly. I was trying to find another place where I could grip the rock, but I couldn’t find any. The rock was too smooth. The twig didn’t have much more slack, and I knew it was going to break soon.

That little twig held. It shouldn’t have held, and I couldn’t believe that it wasn’t breaking. It was still supporting my weight. I should have been falling into the water, and I was hanging off this rock with nothing but a twig holding me there.

Luke bent over to grab my hand, wincing as he did. I made a mental note to ask him about that later, once I wasn’t shaking. He helped me back to my feet, and I leaned against the bush as I shut my eyes. I was alive. I hadn’t fallen into the river. God had made that little twig hold all of my weight until Luke could get my hand.

“Are you ok?? Brett?”

Click here to read the next part of Day Nine.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*

To read part eleven of day nine, click here.

Luke gave me a little push from behind, trying to get me moving again.

“Dora, I’m going to have to call a red light if you don’t start walking. Do you want me to do that? I don’t want to, but if you don’t start walking I’m going to have to.”

It worked. I started walking slowly down the trail, panicking more and more the farther I walked. I was so terrified of that water, and I couldn’t do anything about it.

The funny thing was, the closer we were to the crossing the less scared I was. It  was strange, knowing that I was getting closer but not being as scared.

Soon enough we were walking right alongside the river. If I went two inches to my left I would fall off the trail into the river. I started slowing down and Luke bumped into me, reminding me that I had to keep going.

Right ahead of us was a big pile of rocks that we were going to have to climb over before we could cross the river. They were huge rocks, bigger than I was. I hated climbing over big rocks. I always slipped and fell, and that was not fun. At all.

I was able to get over some of the smaller rocks easily enough. But then they got bigger and it got harder and harder. I think Luke gave my pack a push once or twice, and it didn’t even help. I was thinking about taking my pack off to get up a really big rock when he shoved as hard as he could, giving me the chance to grab the rhododendron that was on top of the rock.

With the push from behind and the rhody (our nickname for it) bush to grab onto, I was able to get on top of the rock. I stood up, letting go of the bush to adjust my pack.

Before I could figure out what was happening and how to stop myself, my feet were slipping down the rock, and I was heading straight for the river.

Click here to read the next part of Day Nine.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*