To read part three of day twelve, click here.

I stood up, not quite ready to go again, but unwilling to hear any more whispering. I was going to do all I could, and they were going to have to deal with it.

I was upset that they would talk about me like that. I had to keep reminding myself that they didn’t know me that well, they didn’t know that I was doing my best. And the ones who were doing the whispering were towards the back of the line and they couldn’t hear me breathing. They couldn’t hear me trying to get more oxygen in my lungs, because I wasn’t getting enough.

“Brett, you go up to the front of the line. Ok?”

I hated being at the front. But, sometimes it was the only way to survive. I climbed up to the front of the line, ready for another break as soon as I reached the front. But I couldn’t quit so soon. I kept going for almost five minutes, pulling myself up the mountain with my arms at times. But after five minutes, I couldn’t keep going. I wasn’t getting enough oxygen and I was starting to get dizzy.

“Red light.”

I managed to get the words out as I stumbled forward a couple more steps. There was a log there that I could sit on. Luke, who had been walking behind me, came to sit next to me.

“Are you ok, Brett?”

I wanted to start screaming at him. No, I was not ok! After following me up that hill, after listening to me breathe, did he really think there was even a chance that I was ok?

When I tried to answer him, I couldn’t talk. I don’t know how I managed to say “red light” before. I gave him a thumbs up and he nodded his head.

“I know you’re not doing great. But you’ll make it, you’ll see. We’ll all make it, and we’ll be to our campsite before you know it.

I was able to talk now. I was still having trouble breathing, but I could talk.

“Really?”

“Yeah, we will.”

Click here to read the next part of Day Twelve.

*Everything here is from my own memory and may not be correct. Outward Bound is not responsible for anything I post here. Thanks too NCOBS for letting me use their photos.*